Reviewed by Fehu
Vampirism and You! by Missouri Dalton
3.75 Pants Off
Louis’ whole life was
planned right to a bite on the neck at his seventeenth birthday. The
British native has a whole lot of changes coming his way. There’s the
cravings, the urges, the relocation to rural USA…it’s a lot for a
teenager to handle. Throw in the possibility that he might not be as
straight as he always thought and it’s a tangled mess as Louis tries to
navigate his new life as a vampire.
Things aren’t going to be
easy though, and his foster-vampire Duncan is determined to make Louis a
fine upstanding example of vampirism—or else. Louis has his handbook
though to explain well, some things. But not everything.
new vampire shows up in town, Louis thinks he’s finally found someone to
confide in, except Eli has his own agenda and Louis is about to find
out that being a vampire means more than drinking blood and causing
mayhem—there are also dirty politics, dark secrets, and a whole lot of
Let's talk about book chemistry! With some stories I can get into the story from the first sentences and this was the case with this one, though I don't read a lot of vampire stories, Louis's bratty voice drew me in. I liked the references to modern shows and movies, like Twilight and Interview with a Vampire; they were all worked well into the story. So what is the story about?
The first person narrator is Louis, who has been rather less willingly turned into a vampire and now has to move away from his family, that is serving a vampire countess and move in with his new vampire guardian Duncan, to the USA. Now Louis have to learn how to be a proper vampire, there is a guide book (which is pretty funny) and adapt to a new live as a high school student, as if being a vampire wasn't enough of a challenge and his sadistic foster parent makes him participate in a drama club as a punishment, which wouldn't be so bad, if all his new classmates didn't smell like food to poor Louis. While Duncan is out of the house Louis meets Eli, another vampire and his blood brother, bitten by the same countess, who he later finds out is also a psycho killer, who doesn't stop from killing his own or drinking their blood unwillingly, even if that is forbidden. All is not well in the archaic vampire society and Louis and Duncan find out they are in the thick of things, they have strong allies but their enemy is the current Lord Dracula himself, if they want to have their revenge for the people they lost or change things in the vampire society, Louis will have to fight Dracula for his title.
I did mention that I did fall into the story quickly, the characters are well developed and I liked the sarcastic comments or the funny way the vampire guidebook was written (for the most part). The story is not fun and light like it appears in the beginning and it's not all about teenage angst or adapting to a new role/ way of life. There are some serious themes mentioned, like rape of a minor, which happened in the past, and is not graphic but it's still one of the darker parts of the story same as a mass murdering of humans, which is described, so this part of the book might not be for everyone’s taste.
Honestly I liked the first part, which was light-hearted quite a bit more and would have given the book a better rating had it stayed that way. The adventure and intrigue part progressed rather quickly and the arising challenges were solved too fast for my taste, especially after all the build up. I'm giving it more that 3 pants off for engaging characters, making me laugh and an interesting take on a vampire story.